Sunday, July 18, 2010

BREAKING. Is that an Echo? Faux bling to fake boobs as 14 starry-eyed housemates enter the fifth Big Brother Africa in an All Stars season.


I call it Afro trash. And I mean that as a compliment. Sortof. With more fake bling, faux hair, push-up boobs, totally insincere air kisses, multiple utterances of ''I'm just going to be myself'' and lots of crotch grabbing, Africa's salacious media fauna gathered around the water hole that is the new Big Brother Africa house at Sasani Studios in Johannesburg earlier tonight for the launch of the new fifth season, entitled Big Brother All Stars.

Big Brother All Stars will play out for the next 91 days in producer Endemol SA's camera-riddled warehou-, uhm comfortable housemate abode, decorated in a pastiche of dramatic nouveau French furniture and chandeliers and a wall colour scheme that screams purple and blue. With a jacuzzi and pool, state of the art kitchen and leisurely lounge area, the 14 trashtastic contestants, culled from the previous seasons, will all be under 24/7 surveillance and the watchful eye of Big Brother as well as viewers across the continent on DStv channel 198.

Befitting a season seeing the return of some of the most (in)conspicuous reality TV characters viewers have already seen once before, Big Brother Africa presenter IK Osakioduwa was ironically supplied with a presenter echo. . . with a capital E. The virtually vacuous Echo in a pastel baby blue creation and a dress slip up to her navel, welcomed the returning housemates with vapid enthusiasm, exclamations of ''congratulations!'' (for what?) and a British accent last encountered when Stanley went in search of Livingston in darkest Africa.

The 14 contestants in Big Brother All Stars who entered the house in this evening's launch episode before a group of screaming fans, are Code (34) from Malawi, Hannington (24) from Uganda, Jen (23) from Mozambique, Kaone (26) from Botswana, Lerato (26) from South Africa, Meryl (24) from Namibia, Munya (24) from Zimbabwe, Mwisho (29) from Tanzania, Paloma (26) from Zambia, Sammi (35) from Ghana, Sheila (25) from Kenia, Tatiana (29) from Angola, Uti (27) from Nigeria and Yacob (28) from Ethiopia.